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Toxic Thought Machine

by Border Patrol

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1.
This World 02:51
Traffic’s backed up seven miles Outbound flights are all delayed Scavenge food from grocery aisles Only skylines give us shade Radiation from our cell phones lesions growing in our lungs prizes we were promised once we made it to this rung I’ve got booze to shred my liver I’ve got pills to fix my brain Trash is boiling in the river And there’s acid in the rain We deserve whatever’s coming It’s foundation that we’ve laid We won’t survive this world we’ve made Shrinking forest set ablaze filthy ocean fraught with oil hope there’s sunshine through the haze shuffle off this mortal coil Melting icecaps in the Arctic rising shorelines all around We medicated masses have grown too deaf to the sound I’ve got booze to shred my liver I’ve got pills to fix my brain Trash is boiling in the river And there’s acid in the rain We deserve whatever’s coming It’s foundation that we’ve laid We won’t survive this world we’ve made It doesn’t have to be like this we’ve gotta break pace with the herd realize we don’t write the rules we are not nature’s last word I’ve got booze to shred my liver I’ve got pills to fix my brain Trash is boiling in the river And there’s acid in the rain We deserve whatever’s coming It’s foundation that we’ve laid We won’t survive this world we’ve made
2.
Daze 02:46
I signed up for the army of the working dead Just to make enough cash to put a bullet in my head I'm not planning on going anywhere, but it's nice to have options With arms outstretched they welcomed me said, "Look here at the way that you're supposed to be" so I took it day by day and in due caution Now I've got insurance and it even covers dental but my biggest threat to health still is and always has been mental There are days I wish life was already over There are days I wish that life would never end It's not knowing which I'm waking up to every single morning Makes it hard to carry on my friend I broke down in the city watching people move so I grabbed a pint and wondered if my parents would approve I think that I could make it go away if I could just kill my conscience With glasses raised they welcomed me said, "Look here at the way that you're supposed to be You know that life you lead is complete nonsense" Now I've got a buzz on and I'll swagger when I walk But I can keep my shit together just as long as no one talks There are days I wish life was already over There are days I wish that life would never end It's not knowing which I'm waking up to every single morning Makes it hard to carry on my friend I passed out on the counter and the bathroom floor and when I came to I couldn't take it anymore I can't keep this up but I can't stop it either so when it comes to life or death I guess I choose neither There are days I wish life was already over There are days I wish that life would never end It's not knowing which I'm waking up to every single morning Makes it hard to carry on my friend Makes our life so hard to comprehend Let's wake up and do it all again
3.
I don’t believe in heaven but I know the devil’s real he’s sitting at my table his hands have touched my meal He rummaged through my dresser and he’s looking for a sign but I can’t tell you what it is he’s hoping he will find I saw him making coffee I saw him feed my cat I sometimes think his actions are more subtle than that He’s at the bar a-drinking And I guess it serves me well Cuz every drink’s another minute I am not in hell Got me a friend and he knows what I like A friend for the darkness A friend for the night Got me a friend and he knows how to use me I think I’m gonna let him till he finally consumes me I saw him in the kitchen he’s sleeping in my room he pays my family visits and my friends all know him too he’s on my couch a-smokin here’s the pipe I saw him use And if I try to outrun him he knows my every move Got me a friend and he knows what I like A friend for the darkness A friend for the night Got me a friend and he knows how to use me I think I’m gonna let him till he finally consumes me He’s telling me there’s no point In getting out of bed He’s the smoke He’s the liquor He’s playing with my head It’s clear he’s gonna get me But what’s really hard to see Is the one I call the devil He ain’t nobody but me Got me a friend and he knows what I like A friend for the darkness A friend for the night Got me a friend and he knows how to use me I think I’m gonna let him I'm probably gonna let him I know I'm gonna let him Hell, I want him to consume me
4.
When the papers came to Camden All the boys took up the call Gathered good luck in their rucksacks Took to leaving with the fall And they took with them their tokens And they took with them their guns Gripping charms of their young lovers But there were no lucky ones She sat waiting on her wicker Watching every day till dusk Until again the air grew thicker And she had withered to a husk And she started to feel broken And she finally felt alone Because the house whose porch she watched from Had long ceased to be her home Now she lives in someone's locket Sheltered in a brass-clad room Another picture in a pocket With a puff of sweet perfume She sent her heart across the ocean For to keep him safe from harm Cut her face out of a picture Said "I'll be your good luck charm" Then the calls came from the general Must've been most every day Another boy whose travels ended On a shore a world away But when she offered god devotion The army offered her a flag And the deepest of condolence From the boys down at Fort Bragg Now she lives in someone's locket Sheltered in a brass-clad room Another picture in a pocket With a puff of sweet perfume She sent her heart across the ocean For to keep him safe from harm Cut her face out of a picture Said "I'll be your good luck charm" And if you wander through the graveyard On your way through Camden town There are many headstone markers Where they've laid a body down Though her grave it bears no etching Know her spirit is at rest For it's finally made it's way back To the home that she loved best Now she lives in someone's locket Sheltered in a brass-clad room Another picture in a pocket With a puff of sweet perfume She sent her heart across the ocean For to keep him safe from harm Cut her face out of a picture Said "I'll be your good luck charm"
5.
Lately I’ve been tired and I know the reason why I’m wearing myself ragged lifting bags under my eyes I am a slave to all my habits at the mercy of my spleen and the fuel that feeds the motor of this toxic thought machine I will drive through the artificial light through our battered bits of city and our rusted scenic sights until I find a place with neon near the door empty seat next to the bar top and a heavy-handed pour Night, she comes a-calling and my trouble’s just begun the way that my mind wanders when the moon evicts the sun and through a brain beset by static I purchase poison cheap all the tiny ways I kill me each night to go to sleep I will drive through the artificial light through our battered bits of city and our rusted scenic sights until I find a place with neon near the door empty seat next to the bar top and a heavy-handed pour I will drive through the artificial light through our battered bits of city and our rusted scenic sights until I find a place with neon near the door empty seat next to the bar top and a heavy-handed pour
6.
Gravedigger 04:39
Well the road ahead is trouble never gonna end picked me up a shovel I said “would you be my friend?” That’s why I cannot love you baby I’m a gravediggin man Well the path we ride is heavy get rest while you can signal when you’re ready and we’ll saddle up again you know the days are aways shorter with a gravediggin man The sun hangs low and lonely at the base of the sky My always-faithful shovel he ain’t never ask why when the moon comes up we’re diggin a trench for your soul baby I’m a gravedigger My heart is a hole Well the night is coming quickly the sky is black and tan girl you’re looking sickly I think a fever’s setting in You know your sickness looks so pretty to a gravediggin man The sun hangs low and lonely at the base of the sky My always-faithful shovel he ain’t never ask why when the moon comes up we’re diggin a trench for your soul baby I’m a gravedigger My heart is a hole Roads will always wander feet will always walk hearts will always feel but they’ll seldom ever talk paths are always crossing time is always sand pray you never spend it with a gravediggin man The sun hangs low and lonely at the base of the sky My always-faithful shovel he ain’t never ask why when the moon comes up we’re diggin a trench for your soul baby I’m a gravedigger My heart is a hole
7.
Girl when you walked in left me in a sudden state of awe, Oh yeah, you crippled me and you know everybody saw. Officer this girls robbed me, yet I do not fear, She’s got my heart and I still want to hold here near. (And hold her dear) Give me a moment because I need to collect myself, Been trying to sort out just how I felt But the way she walks and talks it drives me crazy, I thought it might be time to stop from being lazy. That’s what I brought her here, --- Just to say My head is pounding, my heart is beating fast, I think I'm falling for you Don’t know what I am thinking, Okay I guess i'm thinking, I think I'm falling for you What is this feeling coming on, I must be getting sick, Oh Doctor, Doctor give me something that will do that trick. Her brown hair the way it sways I don’t know what to say, Gives me these insects in my stomach think I’ll fly away. (And Ill fly all day) But I must repent, her lovely scent, it brings me to my knees, To breath you in for just a min brings me a certain ease. And just to spite me you delight me in a tight black skirt, Don’t take this wrong, but I do think that you’re such a flirt. --- Well.... My head is pounding, my heart is beating fast, I think I'm falling for you Don’t know what I am thinking, Okay I guess I'm thinking, I think I'm falling for you Canvas covered in red and this is happening in my head, And that way you sit upon my lap you lovely little perfect cat, And baby we could run away and we would never look --- Back at this place. You are my sweetheart, you are my saving grace--- --- Well.... My head is pounding, my heart is beating fast, I think I'm falling for you Don’t know what I am thinking, Okay I guess i'm thinking, I think I'm falling for you My head is pounding, my heart is beating fast, I think I'm falling for you Don’t know what I am thinking, Okay I guess i'm thinking, I think I'm in love with you.
8.
Some days I don’t even know if the wind blows because I don’t make it outside I lie on the futon sleep with the TV on and wait for a reason to rise Springer’s on TV beer cans form an army Invading my table each day probably should’ve bought food not these beers Ribbon Blue but now I’ve got no money to pay I’ve got no one to blame but myself and my brain about loosing my job it’s my fault it’s my fault wasting away until I change my ways and I put on good shoes and clean up There’s a dead mouse on the floor and bug traps in the drawers while dishes climb out of the sink I’m putting my life on hold never felt so old and I just need more time to think I’m dealing with writer’s block all out of clean socks and apathy’s slowly set in out the window my view is as bleak as the news guess it’s more than just me that don’t win I’ve got no one to blame but myself and my brain about loosing my job it’s my fault it’s my fault wasting away until I change my ways and I put on good shoes and clean up I know, I do know either way the wind blows that this ain’t sustainable stuff But it’s been built in me when faced with adversity often I’m stuck in the rough Things won’t get better no matter the weather unless I’m the one who improves so I’ll get my suit dry-cleaned look life in the high beams succeed or be crushed by the truth I’ve got no one to blame but myself and my brain about loosing my job it’s my fault it’s my fault wasting away until I change my ways and I put on good shoes and clean up
9.
I was the last train out of station I was a brain after jet lag I was trashed in public drinking from a garbage bag You were a boat adrift at ocean you were lotto numbers never called You were smoking by the stairwell you were a city after sprawl I kicked my shoes off and put on Sufjan You left you boyfriend And wore black nylon We were the accident before you realize no tow trucks are coming we were the pipes before the ice broke through the plumbing But it was only ever gonna be a matter of time we got good at being lonely didn’t need partners in crime we played a game called feeling ugly and trying not to care cuz diagnoses and neuroses are things it’s better not to share I was a jumper on an airplane I never grabbed a parachute I was the last bit of adhesive when the sole departs the boot You were the laundry on the floorboard you were the empty kitchen shelf you were the last night before christmas when you realize there’s no elves You bleached you hair white then dyed it purple I grew my beard out and drove in circles We were the seizing engine right after the warranty is gone we were the moment you can’t fix it but there’s no way to move on But it was only ever gonna be a matter of time we got good at being lonely didn’t need partners in crime we played a game called feeling ugly and trying not to care cuz diagnoses and neuroses are things it’s better not to share I was the toaster in the bathtub I was a lamp without a cord I was the puzzle missing pieces that you’d play with when you’re bored You were the women and the children As that boat went under You were the mom drinking mescato while her kid play in the thunder You moved to Cali To draw some pictures I moved apartments And drank cheap liquor We were the empty lot a decade after everything’s torn down We were the neighborhood remembered after everyone left town But it was only ever gonna be a matter of time we got good at being lonely didn’t need partners in crime we played a game called feeling ugly and trying not to care cuz diagnoses and neuroses are things it’s better not to share
10.
Drones 04:39
Someone behind a computer Someone many miles away Someone who will never see me Killed my mother yesterday And somewhere they have got a family Somewhere many miles away Somewhere I will never visit Maybe Denver or Green Bay And I haven't slept in days now I think I'll never sleep again Peace is never nearby Livin in the lion's den When we dream, we dream of drones dream, we dream of drones we dream of smoke and sulfur dust fire and burning bones we dream of chunks of rubble the remnants of our homes you'll never catch me sleeping when we dream, we dream of drones This was nothing that I asked for This was nothing that I did But there's no way to unremember the cries of murdered kids This one used to be a brother This one used to be a spouse This one used to be a parent This one was our family's house And they say that in the movies Your dreams will all come true but I can't seem to fathom Why you'd ever want them to When we dream, we dream of drones dream, we dream of drones we dream of smoke and sulfur dust fire and burning bones we dream of chunks of rubble the remnants of our homes you'll never catch me sleeping when we dream, we dream of drones And maybe someday in your city maybe someday much too soon maybe you will understand me when the smoke obscures the moon Maybe when the power goes out Maybe some day much too near Maybe then you'll finally realize Dreams are always made of fear And we'll go on in that manner A short ways up the stream The world will finally go dark But at least it will not dream When we dream, we dream of drones dream, we dream of drones we dream of smoke and sulfur dust fire and burning bones we dream of chunks of rubble the remnants of our homes you'll never catch me sleeping when we dream, we dream of drones

about

Toxic Thought Machine is our first studio effort. It represents the better part of a year of writing, arranging, recording, and growing as musicians. It touches on topics ranging from self-loathing to our impending doom. It covers falling into and out of love. It has songs about shovels, Jerry Springer, and civilian casualties. It has been a pleasure to make, and we hope that you enjoy the fruits of our labor.

credits

released March 26, 2016

Dave Toennies - guitar, vox
Cody Howard - banjo, vox
Ryan Haggarty - double bass, harmonica, vox
Walter Senko - keys, drums, vox

Recorded and mixed by Luc Michaud at Highland Studios in Windsor, ON
Mastered by Marty Bak at SLR Studios in Windsor, ON

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Some rights reserved. Please refer to individual track pages for license info.

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about

Border Patrol Detroit, Michigan

Border Patrol is a lyrically driven folk-rock group from Detroit, Michigan and Windsor, Ontario. Blending elements of traditional bluegrass and folk with punk and indie expression, they feature vocal harmonies and surprisingly upbeat melodies about our impending doom and the monotonies of every day life and love in this modern age. ... more

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